I have this fantasy life that I sometimes lead and in it I’m pretty well sorted and have my stuff together. You know, when my pantry looks like it belongs on Pinterest, my home is permanently styled for a Real Living photo shoot and I’m dressed in stylish clothes minus mashed banana in my hair. In this fantasy I’m a zen mother and nothing much fazes me. It’s a ridiculous notion of course but I’m the queen of comparisons and with this comes an expectation that everyone else around me has it together whilst I’m still just pottering about. I’m gradually learning though that in reality, we are all just pottering.
Charlie turns two in a couple of months and with this comes thoughts of his birthday party. He’s two, so of course he has no thoughts on the theme, colour and style and I know that none of this really matters but this doesn’t stop me from scouring Pinterest for inspiration (providing I stay away from pins that relate to home storage I’m good). Charlie’s current obsession with all things trucks suggest that it’s looking like a construction style party. Who knew you could buy cupcake flags in the shape of a hard hat?
So as it get closer to watching my gorgeous little boy become a two year old I’ve started to reflect on the past year and in particular the past six months. I’ve recently read that the age between 15 months and 2 years is a little bit tricky. There are a few big developmental leaps, a growth spurt or two and goodness knows what else going on in his cute little mind. (I’ve since read that age three is harder than two and then age four is harder than three so I now know not to read about this subject anymore lest I start freaking the freak out.)
So as a mum to a wonderful little person, here is what I have concluded so far –
1. Charlie is fun and funny. His smile and his laughter is pure heaven and I can see this kid is going to forever make me laugh. He is of course like most toddlers in his thinking and that is the whole world revolves around him and him only. He thinks scuttling over the couch and dive bombing the cat is hilarious not to mention a perfectly safe and reasonable thing to do for both him and the poor cat. He has recently learnt to make a fish face whilst simultaneously pretend to play the xylophone. Sooo clever and he makes my heart sing.
2. Charlie is not dissimilar to that of a small cyclone. Or a hurricane. This depends on the day and the moment and he can eridicate a room in zero to ten seconds. I have had to learn very quickly that chaos is the new tidy.
3. Art and craft is not for the faint hearted. Before I became a mum I honestly thought I would love playtime and especially anything that involved glue and glitter. I love a sequin and the idea of sitting at a table sticking things on things is very appealing. I think Mr Maker is a genuis. I’m hopeful that as Charlie gets older art and craft will get more enjoyable but at present we are still in the crayons-are-for-chewing phase and the cat still has paint on her tail.
4. Food is a weapon of choice. I love spending a day at the office, leaving to rush home, lovingly cook a delicious meal from scratch only to throw it out because Charlie prefers pasta and grated cheese. Hurricanes need the energy I suppose. Carb loading at all that.
But more than anything, this is what I know – It doesn’t matter what kind of fantasy life I sometimes dream up there is nothing in this world that I want or need more than Charlie and my family. Pregnancy did not come naturally to me and I openly and honestly admit that motherhood doesn’t come easy to me but Charlie is my best work and my life lesson. He is joyous and spirited and he is balm to my soul.