Another day, another series of media reports of males in society screwing it up. Idiot thugs punching innocent people resulting in the most tragic of outcomes. Silly sportsmen saying inappropriate things all in the name of “just a bit of fun”. Politicians sending tasteless text messages, men hurting their wives, partners and children. At worst, the stories are distressing and the circumstances are heartbreaking. In other instances they generate debate as to where you draw the line in the sand between offensive and lighten up. Most of the stories are impossible to comprehend and make you wonder who are these people and are we breathing the same air?
But here’s the thing. Thank God these men are the minority. Of course by making this statement I’m in no way diminishing what the victims of these awful perpetrators experience. My heart broke this week for the mother who lost her youngest son this week. I have a son and her pain is surely something I couldn’t bear to imagine. It’ s just that we can’t allow the jerks we read about all of the time to take all the limelight. They clog up our news feed and tarnish the reputations of men who don’t deserve to be placed in the same category as these mindless fools.
But I do want to acknowledge that whilst we need to hear these stories, we need to address the problems, we need to talk about them, we also need to remind ourselves that these hateful people (not all are hateful, some are just knobheads) are indeed the minority and that the world is rich of good men. Great men, good blokes, decent guys. Those that are caring, thoughtful, kind and respectful. I know plenty. I’m married to one for starters. But I have cousins, uncles, brother in-laws, friends and more now than ever before am I grateful for the men I know. My husband is the best of the best. He’s far from perfect of course, in fact he’s painfully a perfectionist, sometimes plays the cranky card but more than anything he is kind, he is my voice of reason, he works damn hard, he is a brilliant dad, a protector and he loves and cares for me. He deplores anything that hurts women, men and animals. This man didn’t blink an eyelid when I bought a thermomix and didn’t raise an eyebrow when I had my first thermomix dinner disaster (chicken risotto – don’t ask.)
I have girlfriends who would say the same thing about their husbands and partners, friends who could say the same things about their fathers, sons and brothers. Men who we want as role models for our children, men who we want around when life turns to custard.